It’s half term! One half term down, five to go. No, wait, come back, don’t go cry in the corner…
Have a beverage of your choice – you’ve earned it.
When we reached this particular half term, my overriding feeling was relief. This one is always a monster. We go from the light evenings and reasonable temperatures of September to end up here: wet, windy and dark October. At least November usually has a few crisp, beautiful mornings to remind you the world is lovely – what exactly does October bring to the party?
Absolutely nothing1.
In school, your timetable has been through a couple of cycles, so you know most of your classes, which unfortunately means you know which ones you are dreading and the others you are looking forwards to. If you’re lucky, you’ve reached this point without a parental complaint, but that’s a little unlikely, especially in the post-COVID age where everything is our fault.
Usually, the first complaint is something fairly innocuous like ‘you gave my child a detention for not doing their homework’ to which the response is always ‘yes, they didn’t do their homework’. Years ago, we had a student who was identified as high needs in terms of if you named an obscure disease, she had it. Her mother signed all her emails with all the letters after her name – you know BSC, Ma, etc, which I always thought was nice for her, but a little unnecessary in an email about why her daughter was given detention for not doing her homework.
Her emails became longer and longer, usually quoting academic texts and even court cases. My response was always the same: she has to do her homework. By the way, there didn’t seem to be anything ‘wrong’ with her daughter beyond autism and an overbearing mother. There is nothing wrong with autism at all, but the overbearing mother, well…
The mother once told me her daughter was her best friend, which is always a red flag to me, as you are the parent, not a friend. For example, as a teenager, my friends were always up for pint number five but I don’t think my parents would be as keen for me to return home blind drunk2. The daughter was 11 when she told me this.
I think over the course of my career, societal demands and expectations of parents have switched to teachers, and that is not right. I’ve seen students absolutely shattered during the day, falling asleep in lessons3. When I ring home I get ‘he was up all night on his PlayStation4‘. Well, you could, you know, and this is just a suggestion, SWITCH IT OFF AT THE MAINS!!
I also had a mother tell me ‘she knew full well how rude her daughter was, but what was I going to do about it?’. Hmm, let’s see, not accept her being rude to me, and issue sanctions for it, which is why we’re having this conversation because you rung in to complain I gave her a detention for, checks notes, being rude.
We need to work together with parents, and our senior leaders, but there is often a disconnect between all three. SLT are often accused of being out of touch (not usually true) and parents of not caring (also not usually true). Any fool can be a parent, but not everyone can actually parent. Maybe there should be lessons in setting boundaries, how to deal with your child in difficult situations, how not to give in to their every demand, how to not resort to a screen if they are being difficult, etc.
All teachers have behaviour management explicitly taught to them, either at college or in their practice schools. Maybe we should force it on anyone who is pregnant? I’ll probably be accused of wanting a ‘nanny state’ for this, and I do not, but children are literally the future, and right now, they are being let down. This goes across all classes, by the way. Some of my most challenging students have had everything handed to them on a plate, and my most delightful had nothing. At least the second lot are grateful for any help they get.
Anyway, enjoy your half term. Switch your laptop off. If you get emails on your phone5, mute it for a week. Get yourself outside and bask in glorious daylight. It’s the last you’ll see until Christmas.
Until next time.
David Watkins 
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